FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Randomize