standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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