So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
