hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
there is puke in my bra ... again
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