Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
