all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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