i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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