we're chasing vodka with high fives
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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