dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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