It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
