If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize