her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Rumble strips road head = magical
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
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