My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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