Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I CAN MOONWALK!
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize