Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
