i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
