It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
