I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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