In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
