i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
