i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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