Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
