I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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