i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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