I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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