He asked me if I "almost moaned"
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize