Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
