THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
