I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
