More tranny stories later!
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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