you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
