I think my vagina is haunted
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
