And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
What drink are we having for lunch?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
