When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
