wrigley field is MILF paradise
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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