is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
