Don't you send me to vm
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Randomize
