Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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