i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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