Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
