tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
