Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
