Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
