I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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