I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
