If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
