Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize