i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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