hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
