i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
