I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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