A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
