Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
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